I've been thinking bout my mom a lot lately. And that's something I've struggled with since she died. I love her and I miss her and I think about her everyday. But usually I just don't feel like I can talk to her. Everytime I do its like people look at me like I'm crazy. I feel like they are thinking "why are you talking about her? She's dead" .. I know that's horrible to say. I feel bad for saying that, but its true. I am happy and I love my life right now. I just want her in it so bad and I know its not gonna happen. I think about the sandy hook shooting victims and from dealing with my moms death I can't imagine how losing a child could be. I don't know. I'm not talkin ne more.

Goodnight.